the longing of a lifetime
When was the last time you wanted something so bad, that you would do almost anything? Possibly buying that next performance horse that could propel your career to the next level. Or maybe it is buying your first horse that you dream of from morning till night. Maybe it is a new ranch or a new rig. For you there is almost no value too high to pay. The intensity of the desire consumes your every waking moment.
The intensity I feel for things of this world (success, money, a new truck etc.) is also the same intensity that I want to understand why life, my life turned out the way it did. It’s really not that bad, BUT why the divorce, why the missteps along the trail of life? In other words where is the wisdom to understand the pain, suffering and longings we all have. Job alludes to this longing in chapter 28 of Job. In the first 27 chapters Job wants to know why. In the first 11 verses of chapter 28 he describes the efforts of mining for silver, gold, iron, sapphires, flint and smelting cooper. Men spend an enormous amount of effort to obtain these metals. After the labor intensive search, man is able to bring these metals out of the dark into the light (Job 28:11). However, Job acknowledges that the wisdom to understand the why of disappointment or suffering won’t be found in the world (vv. 13-14), it is not possible to buy understanding (vv. 15-19), not even the living nor even in death will we understand (vv. 21, 22).
Job reached the conclusion (vv. 23-27) that wisdom to understand his circumstances was to be kept with God. It was not his place to intellectually explain his suffering. Nor is it my place to try and understand why life turned out differently than I thought or even planned. Only God can explain it because He knows everything (vv. 24-27). Job’s point, God’s point, the beginning of wisdom and the end is to have reverence and a submissive attitude toward God and to avoid sin. To trust God and to obey is wisdom. Being divorced and much of my disappointments in life is a direct result of arrogance and a lack of a submissive heart. And the disappointments or the inability to get that thing I long to have is to be left in the care of Yahweh.
The intensity I long for that great performance horse and that new rig, is only a fraction of the intensity I should long to trust and submit to the Sovereign and to pursue obedience. Seeking true wisdom (trust and obedience to Yahweh) should be the most intensive longing and search of our lifetime. “If you seek her as silver and search for her as for hidden treasures; then you will understand the fear of Yahweh and find the knowledge of God.” (Proverbs 2:4-5)